Rock Stars Vow Fewer Greenhouse Emissions

GLENEAGLES, Scotland -- Rock stars Bob Geldof and Bono today announced that they would call on rock stars everywhere to help reduce greenhouse gas emissions through cut backs on rock concerts by 50% over the next five years. "Let's face it", said Geldof. "It takes a lot of energy to have a rock concert. I mean, the band has to get there in their private planes, which are not very fuel efficient. And then, think of the electricity wasted on all those lights and amplifiers and electric guitars and organs. Sheesh! It's mind-boggling."

"And what about the fans?", asked Bono. "They have to get to the concert. So they each come individually in their own cars, or worse, they ride in gas-guzzling SUVs. Think of the energy wasted, and the greenhouse gasses generated!"

"And what about the pyrotechnics?", asked Geldof. "I mean, they combust don't they? Combustion equals emissions!"

The leaders of the G-8 Summit here praised the rock stars for their pledge to produce a cleaner environment around the world by reducing emission-rich rock concerts.